There is a cemetary in Milton that has an unusual attraction. I drive by this old cemetary and inevitably there are joggers and walkers, well… jogging and walking around the paved roads that surround the cemetary. Evidently it is a good dog-walking track as well, since several seniors can be seen walking there various canines around this unusual exercise venue, pooper-scoopers in hand, ready in a moments notice for any mishap. So really, as the mourning citizens of Milton place flowers on the graves of their dearly departed, they can look up to see their concerned Miltonians power walking, arms a swinging wildly, as if they are trying to say, “Hey we are just trying to last longer than your friend there”! Yes, Grandpa always wanted to be buried where he could see the leotard-clad ladies walking with their 2 pound dumbells swinging in their hands! but really? is that really where you pick to walk? I mean it is quiet and peaceful for sure, but there is a actual beautiful walking trail within minutes of this cemetary people!! I don’t understand that conversation, “Wanna go to the track”? “No, I’d rather go walk around the cemetary, they have pretty flowers there” I bet they run really fast after dark…

Speaking of exercise, I broke my ankle last month whilst exerting myself. To date, I have received plenty of advice and heard lots of similar stories. I liked the salesman who came in my office to check on me. He said with a burly deep manly voice, “Was it a Tib-Fib?” Puzzled, I stammered back, “a what?” “Was it a Tib-Fib break”?, he clearly explained in the deep voice. “Well, my doctor said I broke the big bone and shatterred the smaller bone right above the ankle,” I replied back. “Yep!, the Tib-Fib break is one of the most painful of all the breaks!”, he explained “my friend had a Tib-Fib break, it looked like a broken branch hanging there and he was never the same”. (I was a little embarrassed by my lack of knowledge of which was the tib and which was the fib, and all this after feeling stupid for just losing 13 games straight of scrabble for friends on the Iphone!) “Well at least it wasn’t the Femur”, he continued comfortingly in the deep baratone, “I know a guy who got hit by a log that was swinging from a crane, and it snapped his Femur like a twig, the Femur is THE most painfull bone to break due to the sheer size of the bone”! I cringe at another comparison of leg bones with tree limbs and say, “Yes, I have never had a Femur break thank God!” (If he says he that he also has a friend with a stump, I might faint.) “Well be glad”, he concluded, “because that is definitely the most painful! Well if there is anything I can do, just ask, you hear?!” — NO, no, I think me and my lil’ Fib and Tib are healing nicely for now.Thanks though! Or what about the comforting guy that, after I explained it to him, he just said, “Whoa, so you’ll probably be limping the rest of your life then, huh”? WHAT?, Who told you that crap?? No one has ever said anything like that!! Whats my Doctors number??! Tib-Fib…pfff

Yesterday, I went back to the doctor and they were going to take a screw out, yeah, theres a screw in my leg bone that they are going to take out, I know, thats just weird, but anyhow, in order to know where to take it out, they have to know where to cut me. So they taped a paperclip to my leg and then took ex-rays and then looked at the x-rays, back at my leg and then got the sharpie out…yes, I said then they got the sharpie out, and they measured where on the paperclip they thought the screw would be in my Tib or Fib, still not sure, and he made an X on my leg. Then he tells me, Well, We can’t take it out today, but try to keep this marked with a sharpie for me in two weeks when we take it out! With all the technology we have, I had a paperclip taped to my leg and now I’m trying not to forget to keep drawing on my leg so they don’t cut me in the wrong place in a few weeks!! At least it wasn’t my Femur, due to the shear size of the bone, they would have probably had to use a letter opener and a paint brush.