So have you ever really looked at people’s picture albums on FB, specifically the self portraits? (Just Me!:) Ok, we all might take a picture of ourselves once and a while, I get that, and I have actually just recently done it more often, since I have come to the conclusion there needs to be some kind of proof that I exist, and since a 10 year old photographer doesn’t always have my best interests at heart, well you get the picture…err…anyway, why do people insist on taking pictures in their bathrooms?? The only thing I can think of is that might be the room with the best lighting and biggest mirrors?  I mean really, I don’t need to see what kind of wallpaper you have in your bathroom, and I usually just notice that you are almost out of toilet paper or soap, or that you need to clean your shower curtian, or you got some gunk on your ceiling, or that it looks like your hair is parted on the other side…. You can tell some just look for the closest mirror, or any mirror possible..the conversation in TGIFridays would go something like this… “Hey, We were waiting on you, so we could order our appetizers!” –“oh,well I was in the bathroom having a kwik photo shoot….I noticed while I was washing up that I looked awesome!”   yay hurray—barf

…or how bout the TMI anniversary FB status update  “my husband is the most adorable, helpful, perfect man in the universe and I Love him with all my heart and I even might cook him dinner tonight because I just love him so much and he does everything for me an treats me so good and I love him more than life itself and he is the best thing that ever happened to me and I love him so, so much because he makes me feel like a princess and I love him also and also I think hes the greatest person alive, besides myself, and I hope everyone that reads this will realize that I really do love this moron, and also did I mention I love him”  —-barf  (sarcasm and cynicism unintended)

I was out to eat the other night and, as always, the 2 year old has to poop just before the appetizer arrives….so I gather up a diaper and wipes and as manly as humanly possible I head for the men’s room with Miss stinky-pants in tow, hoping that the dastardly deed has not already occured. This time, to my amazement and satisfaction, she actually uses the toilet as it was meant to be used, even if I have to keep having a panic attack each time she touches the toilet seat, but finally she’s is talked into being done and flushes, and… I don’t know, but if you’ve never tried to put a diaper on a standing-up, moving, chunky, 2 year old girl, all while trying not to let her duck under the wall and peer up at the man using the urinal on the other side, well, it could be an Olympic event, because it takes years of training, but this time we were alone, so I found the diaper changing station that happened to be nearby and threw her up on there where she barely fits still, I mean she looks like something out of Gullivers’ travels on that little bed…. Well, I usually feel like a NASCAR pit crew member when I’m in the men’s bathroom, in that I am flying as fast as I can to get the job done and get that girl back on the road before she starts looking around and asking questions, and it is my 4th girl, so I am pretty good at it, but this time for some reason my eyes were drawn to the directions on the sticker on the changing station that tell you not to leave the baby unattended and be sure to buckle them and a bunch of other stuff for amateurs, but that is when I noticed that the directions were also in braille….yes, I said BRAILLE.  The directions at the baby changing station in the men’s bathroom have braille directions on them!!  Yes, as in the language for blind people!! Now really! I don’t care if your a male or female, if you EVER, …EVER,  see a blind guy going into the men’s bathroom with a baby and a diaper and a wipe container, please, please follow him in and help him!!

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